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Miss Thing.Net -- All Web Site Contents Copyright 2005 - 2007 Yellow Tuliip Press. All Rights Reserved.
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miss thing, Miss Thing, satire, style, accessories, movies, home decor, personal care, satire, girl, woman, games, music lyrics, Jessica simpson, britney spears, jennifer aniston, martha stewart, paris hilton, nicole ritchie, paula abdul, t-shirts, classic movies, polls
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Forget about Paris...and Lindsay...and Britney. Here’s one 22-year-old Miss Thing actually giving young women in the entertainment industry a good name. Instead of partying her life away and then rotting in rehab, she’s been busy starring as Ugly Betty, the sweet, smart, adorable (yet cosmetically challenged) heroine of one of TV’s hottest new shows -- and winning Golden Globe and Screen Actors Guild awards in the process. Before landing her life-changing role, America earned her degree from USC with a double major in Theater and International Relations. She’s even been congratulated by the U.S. House of Representatives as being a role model for young Latinas (not to mention unibrows everywhere) -- which is why we are proud to call her our Miss Thing of the Month!
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Shut up and sing? Not these Miss Things. The Dixie Chicks were riding the top of the country music charts when lead singer Natalie Maines told a London concert audience they were ashamed to say that the president of the U.S. was from their home state of Texas. When the off-hand comment was widely reported, country music radio stations across the U.S. boycotted the Chicks, refusing to play their songs. It could have sunk a less determined band -- but not the Chicks. Not only did they refuse to take back the comment, they topped the charts with their next album (and its defiant song “Not Ready to Make Nice”). Plus, they followed up with a successful documentary about the controversy. The moral? Don’t mess with Texas...or Miss Thing!
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December 2006
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It’s a new day for Miss Things everywhere because this hard-working congresswoman (and grandmother) is getting ready to become the first woman speaker of the U.S. House of Representatives -- and third in line to be President of the United States. Besides offering a much better sense of style than her predecessor, Nancy will use her new office to spread those San Francisco values the right-wing whiners love to demonize -- things like a higher minimum wage, true ethics oversight, and sensible foreign and domestic policy priorities. We’re proud to call her our Miss Thing of the Month!
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November 2006
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People either love this Miss Thing or hate her. She’s been a stand-up comedian, talk show host, actress, Broadway producer, blogger, and adoptive mom. She’s been called the Queen of Nice and the Queen of Mean. She’s been in the closet and out of it. She loves Tom Cruise (for some unknown reason). She’s even managed to bring The View back to life (although since she arrived, the show’s other hosts have faded into the tastefully bland background). But no matter which hat she’s wearing or what anyone thinks about her, Rosie keeps right on entertaining us -- and right on being herself...which is why we are proud to call her our Miss Thing of the Month!
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October 2006
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One of the first rules of Miss Thingitude: There’s nothing wrong with changing your mind. In fact, if you’re Arianna Huffington, changing your mind might be the best thing you ever do. After graduating from Cambridge University with an M.A. degree in economics, this Greek Miss Thing moved to the U.S. and forged careers as a political wife, author, and right-wing pundit. But somewhere along the line, Arianna saw the light and figured out the right wing was wrong. Today, she’s a leading voice on the progressive side of the political aisle, author of 10 books, syndicated columnist, radio host, and founder of the Huffington Post, one of the hottest political blogs around. She even ran for governor of California. Best of all, she gave her latest book the perfect Miss Thing title: On Becoming Fearless. Thanks for everything, Arianna. We’re proud to call you our Miss Thing of the Month!
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It’s the guiltiest pleasure of summer. Big Brother, CBS’s filled-with-cheesy-goodness reality show, locks up a bunch of (mostly) good-looking twenty-somethings in a camera-filled house that’s more like a hamster cage and lets us watch their every move 24/7. For the last two summers, the queen of the cage has been Janelle -- who with loyal lieutenants Howie and Kaysar by her side has out-flirted, out-foxed, and out-performed everyone -- even this year’s all-star lineup. Will she ever win the $500,000 grand prize? Naw. Her jealous (and less worthy) co-stars will make sure she doesn’t. But this Miss Thing has won our eternal admiration. Note to CBS: Figure out how to bring her back next year. It won’t be summer without her!
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July/August 2006
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If the pen is mightier than the sword, this Miss Thing could joust with a whole legion of knights -- without messing up her manicure. With steely wit, she takes on the federal government every week in her New York Times column, puncturing the hypocrisy and ineptitude of the ruling Republicans. But don’t think she’s one-sided. An equal opportunity needler, she won a Pulitzer Prize for her acerbic coverage of the Clinton administration. In her spare time, Miss Thing writes best-selling books with titles like Are Men Necessary? Add it all up, and there’s no doubt why we are proud to name Maureen Dowd our Miss Thing of the Month!
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June 2006
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This ex-homecoming queen is part Dale Evans and part Granny Clampett. Short in height but tall in stature, she’s a native of the Great Smoky Mountains, where a tall woman casts a long shadow. Wife, mother, business owner, teacher, and volunteer, this Miss Thing has worked hard to improve the lives of those around her. Her success is well earned: she has it all because she does it all, except cook (she has an empire to run, dammit!). So hats off to our Miss Thing of the Month, Sydney Beard!
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May 2006
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A Miss Thing named Mountain Charley? Charley Darkey Parkhurst (1812 - 1879), known in life as Cockeyed Charley and in death as Mountain Charley, was one of the greatest stagecoach drivers of the Old West -- who just happened to be a woman. Charley was also the first woman to vote in a United States Presidential election some 52 years before women were granted the right to vote. She began life as Charlotte Darkey Parkhurst, born in Lebanon, New Hampshire. Legend has it that she was abandoned by her parents and placed in an orphanage from which she later escaped disguised in boy's clothing. The trick worked so well that Charley continued the disguise until her death...when everyone found out not only her secret, but also what a Miss Thing could really do -- which is why we are proud to call her our Miss Thing of the Month!
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April 2006
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These two marvelous Miss Things are small but mighty. And they don’t just live by the Miss Thing Rules -- they wrote them. Ellison (left) has been known to drop an errant beau with nothing more than a glance. And sister Kathryn once cooked up a delicious scheme to reunite with a philandering boyfriend just so that she could dump him the night before the big dance. These two come by their fabulosity naturally, having been raised by the Mother of all Miss Things...which is why we are proud to call them our Miss Things of the month!
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March 2006
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Who says Miss Thing has to be human? This faaabulous feline has been through more adventures than most people would in nine lives. When her family moved, she went along. But in her heart, she knew she belonged in her old neighborhood. So she set out on her own and finally made it home, only to find strangers -- and a dog -- living in her house. She was angry, sad, and utterly alone. But, like any Miss Thing, she didn’t let it stop her. Using all her cat-like cunning, she eventually convinced the skeptical strangers that she belonged (and needed feeding). Today, she reigns once more as queen of her own backyard. Dorothy was right: There’s no place like home!
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February 2006
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This Miss Thing of the airwaves works tirelessly to help keep us all sane with her Air America Radio program that deflates the right-wing hot air bags who have dominated talk radio since the FCC fairness doctrine bit the dust in the 1990s. According to her Web site, this Brooklyn native was a secretary, waitress, trucker, and U.S. Air Force aircraft mechanic before beginning her "radio odyssey" in Seminole, TX. After stints in Alabama, Milwaukee, Dallas, and New York, she became the queen of Miami talk radio, returning to New York in 2004 to join fledgling Air America. Her passions are truth and democracy. And on Fridays, her theme song is "Bounce Your Boobies," which is why we are proud to name Randi Rhodes our first celebrity Miss Thing of the Month!
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January 2006
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Professional food critic, prize-winning poet, and recently exhibited artist—this Miss Thing keeps busy as the new muse of Oregon City, Oregon. Politically active and artistically prolific, Anne also finds poetic inspiration in the men in her life, her husband Marc and her newborn son Duncan...which is why we are inspired to name her our first Miss Thing of the Month for 2006!
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December 2005
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This Miss Thing is the poster girl for life-long learning. She came to the U.S. as a young wife who spoke minimal English -- after sneaking with her then-husband across the border from Communist Hungary and spending many months in an Italian refugee camp. Fast forward a few years (and a lot of college classes). Today, she is Chair of the Graphic and Multimedia Design Department and Instructor in Graphic Design at Mission College in Santa Clara, CA. She also has two sons and (although she looks much too young) two granddaughters and has just earned her doctorate degree in Education…which is why we are proud to name Anna Szabados our Dr. Miss Thing of the Month!
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November 2005
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Lynn “Motormouth” Benson Johnson of Northampton, MA, is our pick for Miss Thing of the Month because she is the hardest working blogger on the Web. Not only is this girl 14 months pregnant and elbow deep in ice cream, but she is also raising the bar and pushing the envelope by getting kicked out of high schools for plays with inappropriate subject matter. (What’s inappropriate for high schools nowadays—the classics? Read Saturn Return. See Last Date.) This California transplant in rusty old New England is still kickin’ it old school. Whether published as Ms. Benson or Mrs. Johnson, she’s still Miss Thing to all who know her.
Miss Thing Update!
Lynn is no longer 14 months pregnant! Brian and Lynn Johnson welcomed their son, Alexander Blake, two weeks late at 3:04 a.m. on Saturday, November 19, tipping the scales at 9 pounds, 4.5 ounces, and measuring 22 inches long. Congratulations to Brian and Lynn, and to little Lex for having such a faaabbbbbulous mother and father!
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October 2005
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She’s a Miss Thing for the new millennium. With an attitude as bold and bright as her red hair, this well-rounded twenty-something graduated from college with a business degree and has moved effortlessly into the business world (in romantic San Francisco, no less). She loves music (both making it and listening to it), movies, her adopted stray cat Kirby, and all things French...which is why we are proud to honor her as our Mademoiselle Thing of the Month!
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September 2005
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This unstoppable 82-year-old from Germany has lived alone for many years and is “an absolute hoot” according to her niece Victoria. One of her gay friends even wrote a poem about her. She is sweet and irreverent and opinionated. And she always pays her own way...which is why we are proud to honor her as our Miss Thing of the Month!
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August 2005
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This pioneering Miss Thing once slapped a woman down during service at the Del Rio Baptist Church in Del Rio, Tennessee. A Smoky Mountain school teacher, she was never one to suffer fools gladly. She once attacked a salesman with her umbrella when he accused h er of being modern. She changed the name of the local Ladies Club to the Women's Club. She studied pendulums and played on her college women's basketball team. In fact, this Miss Thing fought her entire life for the rights of women to be whatever they wanted to be...which is why we are proud to honor her as our Miss Thing of the Month!
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